Mr. William Cauley, "Clay" to his friends, aged 22 from Carrollton, KY died and went straight to hell. Friends were surprised he didn't survive a skull crushing he received as a result of his failed base-jumping attempt; his parachute unfortunately failed to open. He is survived by his pet ardvark and will be dearly missed.
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Omg, I just read this obituary, and spit my chocolate milk all over myself, just because that would be very similar to what mine would say as far as I am survived by my best friend/dog, hell he would be there digging my coffin back up, I'm serious, he really thinks I'm his mother, he screams if I leave him to go somewhere, he follows me everywhere, but I've had him since he was 4 weeks old and he will now be 14 years old this November 2021.. That was epic tho.. very good.. 👍👍