King "The Kitten Killer" Caines' disgustingly long life ended today at 666. The King was legendary around El Dorado. Rumored to have had 12 wives and countless children, all preceding him in death, he was plagued his entire life by a personal insecurity resulting from his barely visible bit of manhood.
In order to seek relief from this insecurity, he engaged in many hobbies: gambling, bballing, XBOX (he especially fancied) and watching too much television. He was somewhat obsessed with Craig's Mom, but she wouldn't have him (for obvious reasons).
Poor grammar, poor spelling and micro-manhood notwithstanding, he may be missed.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
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